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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Friends come and go and they leave an impression or some sort of mark on you. I recently had to say farewell to a friend over a serious argument we had with one another, and i feel miserable not only because i trusted this person but this person betrayed me in the most human of ways. I understand that people are human and make mistakes but this was unforgivable-so i had to say bye.

We shared good times and bad times together and i know that we've done a lot for each other, but it sucks that i'll probably never talk to this person again. Friendship goes two ways-i wonder if this person also feels bad about how things worked out. My question is...does a person every forget a friend? Does a person ever forget someone whose done things and been there for them? I guess time just heals saying farewell...but sometimes i question if we were ever friends because true friendship lasts forever...and this person betrayed me...it's a long story but i guess i help but feel bad to lose a friend-someone who i told i trusted them.

I rely on my chevelle to keep me from being too sad.
 

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Sounds like you guys were real close friends and it seems to be affecting you a ton. You're calling off a great frienship over an argument?:confused: All friends get in arguments, and I'm sure this is not the first between the two of you. Could you give us a real brief summary of what was so serious to make you call it off?
 

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The old saying goes:

You screw me once, your the fool.

You screw me twice, I'm the fool.
 

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Unfortunately a great friendship is based on trust, same as any relationship. Betrayal of that trust can damage it beyond repair.

I do hope maybe you guys can work out your differences and, well, kiss and make up, so to speak.
 

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it all depend about the "arguement"... I'm sure the op isn't talking about a ford vs chevy type of arguement.
 

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Similar situation happened in my life recently. Trusted friend to myself, wife and other family members. It is still affecting us on a daily basis because of the extent of his actions. People just do not think thru how deeply the ripples will go, and how long the hurt and dissapointment will last, when they cast the stone into still waters. Patrick
 

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^ or because they are plain ol' selfish
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I don't know, i think it's beyond repair at this point...and you are right Dave, i don't want to let this person back in just to have it recycle in the future...it would be foolish of me. I can safely say this is the first time in my life that i have ever been betrayed by a friend...i don't know how I feel...i feel a strong dislike for this person, sympathy, love, anger, frustration, but also that i just don't want this person in my life anymore...for the better. I guess there's a first time for everything...but it was so unexpected.
 

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That's one reason I don't have friends in the Corps...just acquaintances.

I had a "buddy" that turned out to be a total douche bag, he slept with my girlfriend when I went home on leave one time. I found out a few months later and she moved her ass back home after I found out too. He got out of the Corps before I found out, but I always remember that he acted totally different before he left.

So, sometimes you just have to let things go and do not dwell on them.

Sorry to hear about your lost friendship, but if that's the way you feel...don't let it take you down further.
 

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Argument is one thing, but "this person betrayed me" is a whole new ball game. This goes directly to trust - and it takes a lot of repairing to get that trust back. As much as it sucks you're probably better off in the long run...
 

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when somebody betrays your trust, it's extremely hard to get over. we have a friend like this, when we see her on the street, we are kind, and friendly, but she'll never be let back in the circle. she went beyond lines that couldn't be forgiven. we hope she's happy, we hope the best for her, but we can't interact with this person as friend or family anymore.

i have over the last couple years been devastaded by "friends", it seems there is no honor anymore, people want what they want, without thought of ramifications. we bitch about the upcoming generation, but who do they have to look to? it's our generation that would rather be friends with thier kids than parents, it's our generation that is burning relationships at an alarming rate, and before i get flamed, i'm not pointing fingers at anybody specific, i'm sure all your relationships are gold, but the stats are out there. we have far more single parent families, and it's common today to hear somebody working on thier 3rd or 4th marriage, and i can tell you, there are many young men out there with kids, that haven't any intention of getting married. we've raised a bro before hoe generation.

i'm sorry about your friendship breaking up, i personally now just how you feel, and it's going to suck for a while, and it makes you leery to start new friendships. hang in there.
 

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Years back, my best friend nailed my girlfriend. I immedietly decided his friendship was not worth having. He ended up marrying her and they re still together. Over the course of the last several years, he and I have become friends again to some degree. I never loved her and never would have. Apparently he does so in the end it works out better for everyone. Did he go about it the right way? No, but apparetnly the relationship with the girlfriend wasn't all that well anyways as it takes two to do that dance.

Life is funny the way it works. Who knows a few days, weeks, months, or years down the road, you may do just like me and realize that the huge break in trust, really isn't that big a deal after all.

Jeff
 

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Life is funny the way it works. Who knows a few days, weeks, months, or years down the road, you may do just like me and realize that the huge break in trust, really isn't that big a deal after all.

Jeff
That's what I was thinking, Jeff just words things better than I do.:D
 

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I'm young at 24 but I've had alot of close people come in and out of my life most of them just moved on, got married or just grew apart. I've had two that I felt I was wronged one nailed my gf at the time and I found out a week before he moved and he denied it for over a year and yet she broke down after a couple weeks and told me the truth even though I already knew. He and I are now friends again since he has moved back now will I ever trust him as much as I once had probably not but we are still friends and still comes over alot. The other kind of tried to put me in the position to choose over him or his ex who while they were together he only let her hang out with me mostly and I wasn't going to be put into that situation so even 5 years later her and I are still the closest of friends and her son is my godson that I love them more than anything in this world. Its funny how things end up. I would've never guessed this 6 years ago when it all started that how things would end up. Sorry for the rant.
 

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Years back, my best friend nailed my girlfriend. I immedietly decided his friendship was not worth having. He ended up marrying her and they re still together. Over the course of the last several years, he and I have become friends again to some degree. I never loved her and never would have. Apparently he does so in the end it works out better for everyone. Did he go about it the right way? No, but apparetnly the relationship with the girlfriend wasn't all that well anyways as it takes two to do that dance.

Life is funny the way it works. Who knows a few days, weeks, months, or years down the road, you may do just like me and realize that the huge break in trust, really isn't that big a deal after all.

Jeff
uhhmmm was she related to anyone I know by any chance?? :D
 

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uhhmmm was she related to anyone I know by any chance?? :D
No, not Brenda. She was a diffrent kind of cookie herself, but that was about 20 years ago or so. :D

That whole deal with her and her brother and your cousin still makes me laugh though. It all started out so innocently with a simple "my cousin lives in darboy" by you. Whats that they say, everybody knows everybody through six degrees of seperation. That kind of proves it.;)
Jeff
 

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I can add this in. My dad grew up with a guy, went all through high school with him and stayed friends after. They ended up in an argument over something stupid and long story short, 15 years went by with no involvement. They ran into each other at a car show and rekindled so to speak. That very person has been the biggest help to me and my mother since my dad passed away in February. Real friends never go away as far as I'm concerned.
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
I can add this in. My dad grew up with a guy, went all through high school with him and stayed friends after. They ended up in an argument over something stupid and long story short, 15 years went by with no involvement. They ran into each other at a car show and rekindled so to speak. That very person has been the biggest help to me and my mother since my dad passed away in February. Real friends never go away as far as I'm concerned.

You're right too Tom, i have some real friends that will never go away.


I learned something from this whole thing though, i should be even more careful about who i trust...i just never figured a close friend would truly screw you over to the point it's in your face. Sometimes you have to be more wary of the people close to you than those who are your enemies lol. This word is a messed up place. Although she apologized so many times, it does not change the fact. i just need more time. We are all human, we all need to be loved...just like everyone else. I don't want to hate anybody, i guess that some relationships-friends or more-aren't meant to be.
 

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I have had a lot of friends and gfs come and go all throughout my life too. I have been cheated on before but not with someone I actually knew, which was probably a good thing. When I grew up, it seemed as if neighborhood friends were in some sort of big popularity contest. If one kid had more toys or nicer toys then the rest of the kids, thats whom all the kids wanted to hang out with. Some kids even stole stuff from the other popular kids. The only time we were all happy as a group together was when we were playing football at the park. It seems things change once you get into high school when things like jobs, cars, girls, sports starting taking up more time. The less you have to spend hanging out with friends in the neighborhood. A few even dropped out of HS. Me and several other kids stayed and graduated.

I havent seen any of them in almost 20 years. I know that some delt with alcoholism, some spent time in jail for various things, some married, etc.

Back when I was in my partying days. I used to hang out with a group of friends after high school and like whats commonly said, life gets in the way, arguements happen, people go on seperate ways, etc. Its all kind of part of life IMO. I havent really had a best friend or close friendship before (gfs arent the same), its unfortunate that a serious friendship has to end with these type of issues.
 
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