WARNING
This may be along read
Kind of the opposite of “Elcoman’s” thread
Sometime in 1995 while living in Salt Lake City, I met and started dating a gal that most would consider the stupidest mistake of my life. (I now view this differently) She had 3 daughters that were then 7yr to 14yr. I became very close to these girls during the time I was ‘associated’ with the mom.
Shortly after (’96) we all started living together ‘mom’ suddenly became WHACK_A_DOO , and by the first part of 98 it was clear that we were not working together and I decided to move out (and with that announcement she tossed me out of the house that I was paying for).
This woman turned into the poorest housekeeper on the planet and had no idea how to control her kids. So, being close to the girls, I maintained a close relationship with them until I relocated to Texas.
The mom is hypochondriac and also thinks that everything that ever happens to her is someone else’s fault. The dad is an alcoholic/tweeker that has spent quite some time in the ‘graybar’ hotel.
If I could have taken these girls to Texas with me, I would have in a heartbeat, and I have maintained an e-mail & photo, and birthday card exchanging, and relationship with them since I have been in Texas (2001)
After moving out of her house and into my own, prior to moving to Texas, I would take the girls on trips with me to California, Nevada, and to western Idaho on a “one at a time” basis.
Even after meeting and being attached to my current better half (and hopefully my last) these girls would come by my SLC house and visit, spend the night, have supper, and all other kinds of ‘family’ activities, and they also interacted well with Susan’s 3 daughter’s and the little boy.
I have not had the opportunity to actually come and visit with the girls after moving to Tex., but they have remained in my thoughts almost daily.
So---This week I had the opportunity to come to SLC to do some stuff that is job related. I had misplaced Jenny’s phone number, and had to go to the mom’s house to get the phone numbers I wanted (not pleasant, but had to be done).
Called the middle child first-----she is now 26, with 2 kids----she was excited as hell to hear from me.
Called the oldest child---now 28 with 2 kids----she was surprised to hear from me as well. I sent her an e-mail but she had not checked her mail for a few days.
Called the youngest----24 with one kid---right in the middle of her packing to move, she changed gears and organized a BBQ for the next evening (last night).
When I told them that I had to go to their mom’s, all 3 asked the same question,-----“Oh, how did THAT go??”
Last night at Jenny’s house, when her husband came in, when told how I got the numbers, he said “I’m sorry, I wouldn’t wish THAT on an enemy.” Then he commenced to the BBQ grill.
Turns out that none of the girls associate with their mother or father at all anymore.
Also was informed that during their whole lives, I paid more attention to them than anybody in their family.
I guess that my attending the school functions, taking them places with me, providing a safe place for them to go when ‘mom’ went ballistic, and generally paying attention to them left a lasting impression .
None of the girls smoke, drink, or live questionable lifestyles. Their houses are nearly spotless even with the toddlers, are happily married (two of the husbands were dating the girls when I was still in SLC), well adjusted, model beautiful young ladies.
The BBQ was the best night I have had in a very long time, and nobody wanted the evening to end, but the 5 toddlers were getting ready to crash, and me and 2 of the girls had quite a ride to our homes and hotel.
In 10 years of my wife’s kids being with me, I do not have the closeness I have with girls here. I am closer to the youngest daughter than I am to the twins and the boy-----It just seems my wife’s kids have never really accepted me until just recently. They were a bit older and wild when Susan and I got together, and it was a bit rougher to add “structure” their lives. I hope to get a bit closer to them with addition of 2nd grandbaby in 3 weeks, but I doubt I will ever be as close to them as I am to the ex-GF’s girls.
(my wife just called to see how my visit went----made her happy as well)
Okay----enough mindless babble----taking tomorrow off to drive up and see my mom only 3hrs away from Salt Lake City----that will be pleasant as well.
This may be along read
Kind of the opposite of “Elcoman’s” thread
Sometime in 1995 while living in Salt Lake City, I met and started dating a gal that most would consider the stupidest mistake of my life. (I now view this differently) She had 3 daughters that were then 7yr to 14yr. I became very close to these girls during the time I was ‘associated’ with the mom.
Shortly after (’96) we all started living together ‘mom’ suddenly became WHACK_A_DOO , and by the first part of 98 it was clear that we were not working together and I decided to move out (and with that announcement she tossed me out of the house that I was paying for).
This woman turned into the poorest housekeeper on the planet and had no idea how to control her kids. So, being close to the girls, I maintained a close relationship with them until I relocated to Texas.
The mom is hypochondriac and also thinks that everything that ever happens to her is someone else’s fault. The dad is an alcoholic/tweeker that has spent quite some time in the ‘graybar’ hotel.
If I could have taken these girls to Texas with me, I would have in a heartbeat, and I have maintained an e-mail & photo, and birthday card exchanging, and relationship with them since I have been in Texas (2001)
After moving out of her house and into my own, prior to moving to Texas, I would take the girls on trips with me to California, Nevada, and to western Idaho on a “one at a time” basis.
Even after meeting and being attached to my current better half (and hopefully my last) these girls would come by my SLC house and visit, spend the night, have supper, and all other kinds of ‘family’ activities, and they also interacted well with Susan’s 3 daughter’s and the little boy.
I have not had the opportunity to actually come and visit with the girls after moving to Tex., but they have remained in my thoughts almost daily.
So---This week I had the opportunity to come to SLC to do some stuff that is job related. I had misplaced Jenny’s phone number, and had to go to the mom’s house to get the phone numbers I wanted (not pleasant, but had to be done).
Called the middle child first-----she is now 26, with 2 kids----she was excited as hell to hear from me.
Called the oldest child---now 28 with 2 kids----she was surprised to hear from me as well. I sent her an e-mail but she had not checked her mail for a few days.
Called the youngest----24 with one kid---right in the middle of her packing to move, she changed gears and organized a BBQ for the next evening (last night).
When I told them that I had to go to their mom’s, all 3 asked the same question,-----“Oh, how did THAT go??”
Last night at Jenny’s house, when her husband came in, when told how I got the numbers, he said “I’m sorry, I wouldn’t wish THAT on an enemy.” Then he commenced to the BBQ grill.
Turns out that none of the girls associate with their mother or father at all anymore.
Also was informed that during their whole lives, I paid more attention to them than anybody in their family.
I guess that my attending the school functions, taking them places with me, providing a safe place for them to go when ‘mom’ went ballistic, and generally paying attention to them left a lasting impression .
None of the girls smoke, drink, or live questionable lifestyles. Their houses are nearly spotless even with the toddlers, are happily married (two of the husbands were dating the girls when I was still in SLC), well adjusted, model beautiful young ladies.
The BBQ was the best night I have had in a very long time, and nobody wanted the evening to end, but the 5 toddlers were getting ready to crash, and me and 2 of the girls had quite a ride to our homes and hotel.
In 10 years of my wife’s kids being with me, I do not have the closeness I have with girls here. I am closer to the youngest daughter than I am to the twins and the boy-----It just seems my wife’s kids have never really accepted me until just recently. They were a bit older and wild when Susan and I got together, and it was a bit rougher to add “structure” their lives. I hope to get a bit closer to them with addition of 2nd grandbaby in 3 weeks, but I doubt I will ever be as close to them as I am to the ex-GF’s girls.
(my wife just called to see how my visit went----made her happy as well)
Okay----enough mindless babble----taking tomorrow off to drive up and see my mom only 3hrs away from Salt Lake City----that will be pleasant as well.
