gf left me out of the blue - Page 4 - Chevelle Tech
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post #46 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 4:05 PM Thread Starter
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Gary
 
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

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Originally Posted by langss View Post
If you go back and re-read my post, do not under any circumstances dispose of anything she left behind. Doing so may make you legally responsible for any or all of it. Regardless of what anyone else tells you. The last thing you want is to end up in Small Claims Court, and getting a $5000.00 (or more) judgment against you for a bunch of crap she was going to throw away anyway. That's why you carefully box it up and don't break anything (no matter how good it might make you feel) I personally know several people this happened to and I would hate for you to add to the list. She would not be the first to claim you disposed of her new Computer/Phone/Gaming System.....you get the idea. My Stepson had to pay for a bunch of repairs on his ex Wife's car....she claimed he messed with the car and it was running fine before he came to pick up the kid. He had to start picking the kid up at the Police Station.....do you see where I am going with this.

The other reason is by not damaging anything and having it ready to go.....your sending a very clear message that her leaving was as I said before "Just Like Water Off A Ducks Back".... and there will not be any coming back, Booty Calls..... Etc. I worked at the same place for 36 years....there is very little I didn't watch other people go through. Feel free to PM me if you like.
thankyou for the great advice. she told me to give it to goodwill but women are devious.
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post #47 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 4:19 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

Happy life with no wife.
Iím telling you single is the way to be. More time for cars and a dog. Thatís all you need.
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post #48 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 4:32 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

Well, oddly, if it wasnt to have kids..... I likely would have stayed a soldier and "rented" my "wives" a couple of hours at a time. Theoretically. But we arent designed to be alone, that much I know to be true. I have two great men now, as kids. That is worth the PITA aspect of any relationship. (And I'm not calling Tommy wrong or selfish....its a FREE country... to each his own.......)

Can we? Sure. It is the natural way?> no, we are like DUCKS. we are meant to be paired. Dont always work in the "natural way" as we've evolved into some dreadfully unnatural creatures at times. ( sis and I were raised by a single dad.. as mom was a freak) .

Do any of you recall the phrase " a natural man" or " a natural woman" that was oft heard in the 60's and 70's. I think they're extinct now. The internet and fakebook done killed 'em all.

I dont know if this is valid, but in the past, I've never had luck "looking for Mrs Right". Now, Gary and I are near the same age, so things are different than a 25 or 30yr old. But, somehow, I think it still holds true....dont "try too hard" bud. Solemates come without asking. Or they dont. I got lucky with my wife of ...almost...28 years. She fell into my lap after I nearly killed a man over the cheating bit$$ I was married to. ( dont fret, was only going to knee cap the old man she was gestucking).

Be easy Gary. Lang has some great " close that damn chapter" advice. Move forward, dont look back. Nothing back there for ya.
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post #49 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 5:13 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

Any time you're over 22 years old, a women leaves you, and no attorney has to be called or assets separated, is a blessing.

As to why? That's hard to say. But there are always two sides to every story. But we don't need to know both.

At the most basic level, she wasn't happy. Otherwise, she would have stayed. Is this your fault? Maybe....but likely not.

That said, if she appears to have left you for a "rich" guy over 70, it's likely (but not certainly) a money grab. He's closer to kicking the bucket than you are and has more cash. But, he's also closer to needing "old guy care" and may not be able to "service" her now.....or in the years to come, which will drive her in to some younger guy's arms. His tough luck, if you ask me.

If this is a money grab, here's where she likely messed up: Guys that age with that kind of cash will likely insist on a Pre-Nup before getting married....which won't leave her much. Sorry sister.

A better one will come along. You'll both likely be happier. It's likely for the best.
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post #50 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 5:31 PM
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Lang
 
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

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Originally Posted by gnicholson View Post
thankyou for the great advice. she told me to give it to goodwill but women are devious.
If I can help save you only (1) second of Grief, I will feel better for my effort. You are going through a tough time, and emotions tend to run like waves on the ocean. What ever you do, start now and change your normal pattern. Start leaving for work earlier, coming home later....go to a different market for your groceries, eat at different places, whatever you normally do "Change It All" .... Being predictable can give her lots of comfort. None of this may actually be necessary, but if she is looking for a payout of some sort...you need to make it more effort than she thinks its worth. One of the guys I worked with got hosed so many times, he finally had to take a position in another state to get loose from a women he was "Just" living with. She went to the police with bruises on her arms...said he grabbed her in the market. He had to hire an Attorney, go to court, it cost him a fortune, and none of it was true. Kind of hard to prove if she doesn't know what market you are going to. Remember they have Cameras everywhere now....you need to be totally proactive. Change the passwords on your computer, change the locks on your residence, put your credit cards on hold or report the cards lost/stolen and get new ones. Hold on to her crap for at least 6mos, and then consider donating it to GoodWill. Remember all you have is a verbal from her telling you what to do with it. Make sure you get a receipt when you do. You may want to look into whatever the city/county/state you live in considers long enough to hold onto left behind property. I hope this makes it a little easier for you.......
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post #51 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 7:28 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

On to the next one. Sucks, but time heals all wounds and etc.
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post #52 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 9:23 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

Bro, sorry to hear about your current situation. No matter what, it's going to "hurt" for a little bit. Understand that and refocus and learn. It is probably better off for you. You might have learned something you don't want to know. Move forward and live it up, no one is promised tomorrow... Good luck bro.

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post #53 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 4th, 19, 11:48 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

I've been in your shoes. And it hurts like hell for a while but as others have said, she did you a favor.

In the meantime, I'd like to share a song that helped me during that time. Have a beer and enjoy!

https://youtu.be/XVk_e31dnlE

Jeff

`You can't beat City Hall, but you can piss on the steps."
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post #54 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 7:55 AM
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Keep your head up man! It's good to see you're reaching out. Had a friend try to commit suicide last fall. He kept it bottled up.
Now go find a woman who makes you a better person and vise versa. Or do what makes you happy and let "her" find you.

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post #55 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 11:41 AM Thread Starter
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Gary
 
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

I've felt like it a few times.
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post #56 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 11:42 AM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

F*() her and the horse she rode in on. She's probably been seeing this dork on the sly for the last year or so. Your much better off without her. Did she mend your trousers, or bake you a cake, or fix you dinner (other than a TV dinner), or massage your feet. Look at the bright side, now you don't have to keep saying sorry dear, what's that you say dear ( for the umpteenth billionth time). Do this, do that, I want this, I want that, jump through this hoop.. now that one. If this guy wants her, let him have her, she'll do the same to him when something more promising comes along. Join a dating service or go back to college if your in such dire need of a woman's company. Don't crawl. And as far as her junk. Sh&^ can it. You have your pride. At least your still in the house and not looking for an apartment. If your not interested in long term relationship's the bars are full of women looking for a one night stand. That is if your willing to play Russian roulette with your private parts. Stick with your cars. Much safer and a lot more satisfying.
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post #57 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 12:24 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

^^^^^^^^^^

The above post is nothing short of terrible.

There's bad advice. And then there is pure stupidity.
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post #58 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 3:14 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

i tell the girlfriends u can leave me anytime you want but you have to wait in line when u wanna come back!
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post #59 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 3:29 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

I have been married for over 30 years now, if my wife left me then so be it, her loss not mine, good bye, I will miss you at first. After going through stents 6 years ago I learned to be way more independent than I have ever been. I could be on my own but I choose to stay together even though we now have are older have less in common than we did when we were young, people change. I am in my 60's and learned a long time ago when my parents died that life goes on, so one can either wallow in the moment and let it consume them or move on and enjoy what and who you are with. I always remember, it their loss not yours.
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post #60 of 129 (permalink) Old Sep 5th, 19, 4:33 PM
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Re: gf left me out of the blue

It's true that time will heal all wounds but sometimes it leaves a big jagged scar,all you can do is ride it out the best you can.
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"Iím the one thatís got to die when itís time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to."
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